Malaysia at its best...

It is a still-yet-dishearten feeling that I could not shake off, even till now, that leads me to write this post...I am referring to a report, from the Sun newspaper a month ago, entitled "Ministry will bar 'offensive' publications". According to this article, there are 'undesirable publications that deem to threaten public order, morality or national interest'...man, will you be surprised at the list of the books they have come up with!!!...

Few of the listed books are Rebecca Wells' Divine Secrets of the Ya-ya Sisterhood, Chinua Achebe's Things Fall Apart, political biographies such as Mao: A Life and educational books like How to Talk to your Child about Sex and Breastfeeding your Baby: The Revised Edition...

So let me get it straight...reading about breastfeeding would also teach us how to turn the public order upside down....*snorts*....*psst...can I laugh now??*....* I assume permission is granted*....HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!*rolls on the floor laughing...using hanky to wipe tears...and climbs back to the chair*....Man, next to it, I might as well just dress up like a clown and start doing the Homer's Dance....

But on a serious note, I think it is a real shame...Can someone tell me, how does Divine Secrets of the Ya-ya Sisterhood threaten our morality in any way?...If you ask me, I think that Ms. Rebecca here made a fabulous work of art...A keen insight on sisterhood friendships....yet without dis-missing the vulnerability of human kind...

What about Things Fall Apart?...Sometimes, without any disregard nor disrespect to the Ministry, I really wonder if they have actually taken time of to spent some time reading works of this sort....or are they making a judgment based on reading a summary off a book review...Honestly!!...This piece of literature is classic...one in which I studied and prepared for my SPM, Literature In English subject, years ago...True, I don't deny the indication of violence in the story....but it talks so much about anti-colonization!!!...Isn't that suppose to be good?...Yet, how could one expect Chinua Achebe to write about sheeps skipping and hopping on a vast green meadow, when the story is trying to portray the conflicts' and struggles' of the African tribe, in keeping the peace and order of the community?...Why not then bar the works of William Shakespeare as well? Literatures such as Othello and Macbeth certainly has many elements of kinship, betrayal and violence in it...

This brings me to the book Mao: A Life...His reign in China has been one terror...and the world deserves to know what was behind the scenes and what led to his dictatorship....Why do we want to bury ourselves underneath a coconut shell?...Would anyone really believe that in doing so, we are protected?...IGNORANT...would be a so much better word, wouldn't you agree?...What now...is the Ministry really that afraid that with reading the book on Mao, someone would have gathered his guts to point a gun to our Prime Minister's head?....

Yet, the one that really amazes me, is the barring of the two books: How to Talk to Your Child About Sex and Breastfeeding Your Baby....My hats off to the Internal Security Ministry...Obviously, they are not aware...or choose to be ignorant...whichever suits the situation...of how uneducated the younger generation here, are about Sex. In our Malaysian community where we are still quite conservative to a certain extend, parents talking or even sharing the topic of sex with their children is an unwritten taboo...Well, its no wonder then, our young generation has turned to experimenting among themselves and gets into so much trouble nowadays....

My personal plea...someone tell the Ministry too...please....come on...give us all a break...and not bar these literature...It is already hard enough trying to convince our young generation to read and be curious about the world around them, without giving them another excuse to NOT read...just because the books are barred...heesh...

Honestly, I don't know about them..the Ministry...But I am TRULY, ABSOLUTELY, WITHOUT A DOUBT, REALLY, REALLY, REALLY ashamed on their behalf...so much for a self-declared developed nation...my arse!!!!

Misconception about Contemp...whatchamacalit...

This is the usual scenario...when visiting relatives...or even bumping into an ex-schoolmate, which you've been trying to avoid, the minute you finished high school.....

"Oh...so...what are you studying now??...Engineering degree??....Gosh, you must be making good money in future!!"

"Business Management?...wow....what are you majoring in?".....

"Bio-technology?...that's great!!...How many years before you graduate?"....

And the most common that I've heard so far....

"Doctor?....Gosh...you must have been a top student in your school!!...So clever".....

Well, you get my point...

But its a different case for me....almost every time I visit MY relatives....or even when I tag along with my mom to visit her friends...

"Hey girl (some of the old aunties just can't get the hang of my English name, so to be safe, they just stick to the name "girl"...)...so what are you studying now?....Contemp-what?..."

"Contemporary music?....what music is that?...is that the same as classical??"

"Contemporary music, majoring in performance?....wow, how bad did you do in high school??..."

"Contemporary music...dude, why do you take such an easy subject?...you will have so much time in your hands, that you'll be wasting too much time hanging out in mamak stalls!!"...

"Contemporary music...erm...let me see....erm...erm...

.*blank*/*silence*.....

And the best response that I get....tops the list....

"Contemp music?...you don't look like one...Where are your piercings?...Tattoos?...Do you smoke cocaine?...Does mummy know?..."...(*are you kidding me??*)

So...Summoning the little dignity that I have left...I would just like to make a statement here...for the sake of setting the record straight....to clear all obscurity....and for venting out purposes, of course...

1. Contemporary music...DOES NOT only consist of pop songs....we DO NOT only play pop songs...which consist of an average of 3-6 chords, and 2 basic chord progressions....Contemporary music covers music of the early 1900s...starting from even Stravinsky and Aaron Copland...who are actually classical composers...Contemporary music consists of Blues music, Jazz music (Cool Jazz, Swing Jazz, Big Band Jazz...etc), Rock and Roll, Rock, Metal, Disco and Dancing Music, RNB...get the picture?.....

2. We, contemporary students don't get life easy as many people think....we don't just play music...we have to study them too...It really escapes my imagination...and understanding...as to what and how people perceive Contemporary music to be....they seem to think that we just crank up the distortion on the guitar, strike a few notes in beat and in pitch....that's music....but I do beg to differ...

a)...Learning music...be it classical and contemp (they are a completely different genre, by the way)...takes just as much discipline and concentration...like any other degrees would require....Unlike some professions like business management, Mass Communication...(No pun intended on anyone at all, as I said...its just my opinion)....students would have to bury themselves among their text books and do countless hours of research papers night after night....For us music students, not only are we suppose to produce research papers, but we are expected to practice our instruments every day....to make sure that we stay in shape...and even this, I fail to do, because I'm just so packed with daily assignments and classes...in fact, even as I type this post...it is 1:30am, 7th April '07...and I've just finished my Modern Band Ensemble final exam one and half hour ago...yup...thatz right...I finished class today at 12am....talk about having free time, eh?

b)...Music isn't only learning about notes....we also learn about the theory behind the music...learning to understand what and why the composer has written the music piece the way he did....and through that, we learn to compose our own music too...besides that, we have got to know the history of how music has evolved...we learn Aural Training...transcribing music....Band Ensemble skills....so, tell me...which part of this is easy??....Heesh....

Hey, Don't get me wrong...I'm not saying that studying to be an Accountant or even a Pharmacist is a piece of cake....but honestly speaking...studying music...Contemporary music...ain't any easier either...

3)...true, the market for Contemporary music in Malaysia is small...but that don't mean that its stagnant...we are all here to study music...for the passion of it...be it in teaching, arranging, composing, performing...or even in music technology....we will survive...well, of course...the bland fact of life, would be that....not all of us would make music as our life long career...but, heck...I'm learning something that I truly love....my life is defined and I'm happy...enough said....

4)...Learning Contemporary music don't mean that I need to DYE my hair green, mousse it up....pierce my nipples and my belly....nor get a dragon tattoo!!!...

Its just really frustrating....being labeled "bad" or even "lost"....or worse..."loser"....just because of they do not understand the very thing that I study....well...sorry, if they don't agree with my choice of career...heck, I'm not living for anyone...but myself...

Exam fever...

....one week of leftover food piled up in a corner...a stack of dirty plates still lying on the sink...countless mugs with coffee stains...manuscript papers and research books all spread out across the bed...crumpled papers staring back forlornly across the room...fingers numb, after writing goodness-knows-how-many music scores...night after night, slaving in front of the monitor screen...hmmm...I think I've just graphically described how a music student's life would look now upon entering one's room....my room at least....now whose fault is it?...blame it on the final exam fever....blame it on procrastination...blame it on the "toilet bowl that got stuck"..."my goldfish died"..."my grandmama wanted to renew her driving license"....blame it on anything...except me...It ain't my fault...*Do I hear an "amen" from other varsity students as well?*...*grin*....

...one week just past...and I already looked a good 10 years older...the week is nearly over...yet, let me see....what do I have for next week...erm....I've still have got my Counterpoint final assessment to prepare...overdue assignments to hand in...I've got my Ear Training practical exams...that is 5 bloody chapters of rhythm to slaughter...countless pages of Temporary Modulation Lines to learn up....hmmm...what else...I've got HAMM exam to revise...going through all the theory of sub-dominants...special dominant functions...deceptive resolutions...contiguous dominants...pedal points...hybrid chords...polychords...modal harmony...12 tone serial-ism...ostinato patterns...melodic constructions...and whatever else that I forgot.....a recording to do for Song Writing...a complete arrangement of a given song for Arranging Class...PLUS sequencing....yup, yup...Thatz how my following week will be....hooooooooowwwww interesting.....yay....

To think that I could finally rest in peace after preparing all of the above....*chuckles to self*....FAT CHANCE...says me to my reflection...The phase comes with its own set of problems... where we encounter the technical part of hiccups ...the printer jams up or when the desktop computer hangs due to heavy infestation of viruses and spy-wares...slow internet services...and also in writing of the music itself, confusion in theoretical analysis and of course, lets not forget one of the most common problem...composer's writing block....

*heesh*... But all in all, these are just my petty grumblings on what most varsity music students come to encounter. I have to confess that after all these grouchiness and protest...when the music comes about....the feeling of satisfaction just goes to prove that it is all worthwhile in the end...when the storm is over, that is....

well, lets hope its over with me soon....I can feel my brain cells about to do the jumpin'-jelly-beans dance...

See If You can Interprete this, Sigmund Freud!!

I've never been a great fan of Sigmund Freud...I'm no psychologist...but I do read many of his books and his theories...especially his works on "Interpretation of Dreams"....but I find that I do not agree with many of his hypothesis...I have the privilege of having a major psychology lecturer as my house mate...and in my many discussions and debates with him, I have come to know that he is an avid fan of Freud buddy here....My house mate, James...has always said that we would actually discover more about ourselves, if we were to really understand the underlined meaning of our dreams...thus, I've decided to take up the challenge of keeping a one week journal of my dreams....starting yesterday...but...HAHAHA....*roars with laughter*....lets see if our Freud buddy here can interpret this!!!.....

DAY I - Wednesday (April 5, 2007)

I was at a dinner reunion in an opened restaurant....at night...my external family were all there...my brothers, my parents...my Aunt Mary and Uncle Liam, who came all the way from Aussie...Uncle Joseph from China...a handful of my cousins...and of course...my nagging grandma....

Oh, before that, you've got to know that I've an astronomy enthusiasts...I love watching stars...the beauty of these balls of gas...against the dark blue sky...exhilarating...

Well, anyway...during this dinner, I looked up to the sky...looking out for stars...it was a clear evening...no clouds at sight...well, probably a couple...I can't recall clearly...I was carrying my brother, Esmond, in my arms...*don't ask me how I did that....I myself can't even answer that question...my brother is already 16 YEARS OLD!!!*....but, yes...I was carrying him in my arms....like anyone would carry a kid..and I looked up at the moon...it was full moon...

Here comes a hilarious part....as I looked up, staring at the moon....I saw...a group of penguins....flying....yup...thats it...flying....as if the idea of a flying penguin is not comical enough....as we all know...penguin belongs to the group of birds which DO NOT fly.....but....any doink would know that there are no penguins to be found in a country such as Malaysia!!...North Pole and South Pole...well...depending on what kind of penguins we are talking about....but in Malaysia??!!...(if anyone is not aware of the existence of Malaysia, it is right smack on the equator, having Thailand, Indonesia and Singapore as our neighbor countries)....and as we know, temperatures along the equator line are high all year round...yup...a hot and humid country....penguins existing there...well...that is just un-thought of, wouldn't you agree?....

So you think that is funny enough?....no??....oh, that is because I forgot to add another detail....I forgot to mention that these 'flying penguins' so-called, were flying in a V pattern...like the geese would usually do, when they are migrating south to escape winter....and they were flying...just in front and across the moon in a horizontal manner...like our dear Santa Claus would, with his little reindeers...the ones we watch on telly over Christmas, anyway...

So, in summary...if nobody bothered to read what I've shared above, my dream was....I was carrying my 16 year old brother in my arms(kid's way)...looking up at the moon, I saw penguins in Malaysia, of all places...flying in a V formation...

In my dreams, there were many groups of penguins flying.......there was a group that was flying low, and nearby where we were eating...one penguin...the leader of the formation, I presume, looked to my direction and waved, as if to say hi....That was when I knew....I've lost it...I've literally lost my mind...I, hereby, officially declare that I'm now certified as 'insane'....the stress of my final exams and projects...have managed to penetrate through...and enter my la-la land as well...*curse them!!*...can't even sleep in peace...

When the penguin waved to say hi, the customers of that restaurant exclaimed in excitement....and amazement, I guess...and all of a sudden, my father got upset...the next thing I knew, I found myself in another restaurant....in a closed one this time...then I asked my dad...as to why the change of location...my dad got into a rage, and shouted that I wasn't paying attention in eating...my mind went bogus..."I thought we were watching penguins fly...and now, suddenly my dad went mad..."....

Then I woke up...too much to take for a night, I think....

So, this one is for you, Mr Freud...it doesn't match the Anal Stage Theory...nor Phallic Stage...Genital Stage...nor any other stages that I've come across when reading your works....no alleys...nor motor/speed cars...nor images of falling...just birds...penguins, to be exact...flying penguins...in a V formation....now, what can you say to that??...any takers??