Thursday, July 1, 2010

Parents teach...children learns...

LEGAL DISCLAIMER : The post below are just meant for laughs...it doesn't represent my parents in any way...I don't think my parents will hang me for putting this up...if I'm lucky, they'll get a good laugh out of it...if not, God have mercy...

1.
Parents teach their children RELIGION .
“You better pray that my car can be fixed or else someone's gonna get hurt real bad...”...I jammed my dad's car into a side wall...back seat doors was crushed as a result...

2. Parents teach their children LOGIC.
"Because I said so, that’s why...”

3. Parents teach MORE LOGIC...
"I've had eaten more salt than you've eaten rice, how dare you question me??!!"...a Chinese saying which means that the parent have had more life experiences than the child, and we should always trust without question whatever they say/do...that's a tyrannic act, I'd think...

4. Parents teach their children FORESIGHT.
“Make sure you gotta 'blueprint' of what you're planning to study...where your funds come from?...what are you going to do after your degree?...how long will it take??...etc, etc"...when I was a fresh naive 17 year old, give me a break, will ya!!!...jeez, at that time, the only source of funds I knew was from my PapaMama foundation...

5. Parents teach their children IRONY.
“Keep crying, gal and I’ll give you something more to cry about...you see this cane??”

6. Parents teach their children about the science of OSMOSIS .
“Don't talk with your mouth full and eat your supper.”

7. Parents teach their children about CONTORTIONIST.
“Will you look at that stain on your t-shirt??...I just bleached it yesterday...

8. Parents teach their children about STAMINA and CONCENTRATION...
“Don't even think of movin' from your chair til' you've finished those veggies and your rice...”

9. Parents teach their children about WEATHER .
“This room of yours looks as if a lightning storm, blizzard, flood, and tornado went through it...all at the same time!!!...”

10 Parents teach their children about HYPOCRISY .
“If I told you once, I’ve told you a million times. And don’t exaggerate!”

11. Parents teach their children about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION .
“Man, now you're starting to sound and act like your father/mother!!”

12. Parents teach their childrenabout ENVY.
“There are millions of less fortunate children in this world who can't afford a decent meal at home...now eat your Maggi mee...”

13. Parents teach their children about ANTICIPATION.
“Just you wait until we get home...you're gonna get the best thrashing you've ever had..”

14. Parents teach their children about RECEIVING .
“You are going to get it from me when you get home...just you wait...(refer to Nu. 13)..."

15. Parents teach their children GENETICS.
“You got that crooked nose from your father...your drama skills from your grandmother...sadly, you didn't get inherit any bargaining skills from your mother...”

16. Parents teach their children WISDOM.
“It's too complicated to explain to you now...When you get to be my age, you’ll understand...”

17. Parents teach their children about JUSTICE .
“One day you’ll have kids, and I hope they turn out to be a pain just like you..."